Friend vs Psychologist

A friend is a person that supports, loves and understands you. You can confide, have fun, and just authentically be yourself with them. Friendships also come with respecting boundaries between friends. Boundaries are rules that determines the structure of the relationship between the individuals, and what they may cross and may not cross. By setting up clear boundaries between you and a friend, you know exactly where you stand, and how you move within that friendship. How you set up boundaries will differ from friend to friend because not all relationships are the same.

The reason I speak on setting boundaries with friends, is because sometimes as friends we don’t recognize that we are overstepping or relying on our friends too much emotionally and mentally. Particularly with our issues that sit heavy on our spirit or mind, issues that are meant more for a therapist rather than a friend. Sometimes your friends are also going through their own things, or what you confiding in them is bigger than what they can advise you on, or possibly your friend might want a break from being your personal therapist.

I have a friend I had always run to when I needed to speak about my personal issues because we shared similar experiences, but I recognized that I could possibly be putting to much into her own energy/space, despite sharing similar experiences. When I recognized it, I stopped, and went to seek professional help, to guide me in ways to maintain my own mental wellness. Positive reasons to talk to a therapist:

1. “A therapist won’t judge you,

2. A therapist isn’t pushing their own agenda,

3. They are required to keep your secrets,

4. A therapist has years of training to help you address the problem,

5. With a therapist, you don’t have to feel guilty about feeling needy,

6. They won’t minimize your problems,

7. Talking to the wrong people might make you feel worse, and

8. They can help you grow as a person”.

I am not saying that you should not confide in your friend, or your friend shouldn’t emotionally support you. I am suggesting that certain conversations be remained for professionals (priests included), so your friend is exactly that, and not also your therapist.

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-Sources: [Gold, T. (2018) ‘8 reasons your friends (and Twitter) should never replace therapy’ >https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/reasons-to-talk-to-therapist-not-friends#1< ].